Max Verstappen's Private Jet Proves That He's A Supervillain In Disguise

Look at this jet and tell me whoever is inside isn't plotting to take over the world

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They say that one look from Verstappen alone can send Nicholas Latifis everywhere into the wall
They say that one look from Verstappen alone can send Nicholas Latifis everywhere into the wall
Photo: OZAN KOSE / AFP (Getty Images)

Imagine a supervillain. Any supervillain. Aside from the menacing demeanor, evil ploys to take over the world, and pseudo-goth fits, there’s one other thing these evildoers have in common: An equally menacing form of transportation. By this logic, Max Verstappen is a supervillain thanks to his private jet.

This observation comes courtesy of a tweet by The Red Flags F1 podcast. I mean, just look at this:

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A few more looks:

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Look me in the eye and tell me there is not a supervillain in that jet’s cushy confines, leisurely devising his next plans for world domination. You can’t. You literally cannot do it.

According to The Sun, a bastion of true journalistic integrity, Verstappen bought the plane from Virgin boss Richard Branson in 2020 for 12 million euros, or about $13 million in America by today’s conversion rates. It also apparently costs another $1 million per year just to maintain and use the damn thing.

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The plane itself is a Falcon-900EX. That distinction means nothing to me because I am not a Plane Person, but after Googling pictures of the interior, I am suitably impressed. I would sip champagne and laugh maliciously in those formidable armchairs. I would shower in the luxury bathroom, using the steam of my scalding water as fuel for my cold, wretched heart. I would recline my swanky seats to form a full-sized bed, where I’d dream sweet, evil dreams.

It all makes sense. Verstappen has most of the other supervillain qualities I mentioned before. He simply does not give a fuck about his competition or about the press, which does tend to lend quite a menacing demeanor. He obviously wants to take over the (racing) world. As for the outfits, well...

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Image for article titled Max Verstappen's Private Jet Proves That He's A Supervillain In Disguise
Photo: Mark Thompson (Getty Images)

There’s only so much you can do with a closet full of Red Bull Racing-mandated attire. But the private jet? The private jet seals the deal.