Ah, the great outdoors. As the weather warms and the trails begin to thaw, off-road adventures begin floating to the top of our brains like the head atop a smooth summertime lager. Last Friday, we asked for your favorite off-road memories, and you answered in droves. Here are a few of our favorites.
Riding in a friend’s XJ Cherokee though some back roads in West Virginia in a failed attempt to find a some moonshine.
My friend Nate and I were camping with some other friends when we were told about a moonshiner ‘up the road a piece.’ We followed the directions for about two hours through some dirt roads that barely qualified as ‘roads’
We never did find the alleged moonshiner, but the weather was beautiful and West Virginia is pretty in the fall. The dirt road took us to a little town in Eastern Kentucky where we gassed up, had some really good country fried pork chops, then took the paved roads back to Beech Fork.
As fun as the off-roading in West Virginia sounds, I regret to inform you: You can just buy Everclear. From my understanding, it’s nearly equivalent, and a handle of it is twenty dollars. From my college math, it’s the most molecules of alcohol you can get for your buck.
This. Anything from a county road that includes creek fording to full on Burning Rock Offroad Park, it matters not; the state is achingly beautiful.
My brother, cousin, and I made a trip starting at Twin Mountain Offroad. John, the owner, is a British ex-pat with a wonderfully dry sense of humor. He was getting me to try a little left foot braking to pick up some torque in one particular stuck.
I snapped my front halfshaft at the diff. Not a great look for a weekend of offroading. The cool thing is that I now have an obstacle named after me, which is a rare occurrence. Anyone can now try Gregory’s Gear Oil Gully. John got us transported back to his shop, where he keeps his 30 or so Land Rovers (including the good Defender), 20 or so of which are running, a Unimog, and a Mercedes FC thing with 45 inch tires. We got bandaged up with orange duct tape and some Glad Press-n-Seal around the holes in the diff. The thought process was that any metal spinning around in there could cause more issues. It wasn’t until later that I realized the hub is held in place on that side by the shaft.
But, we went on our way.
We left the cousin behind and went to Burning Rock. Some of the trails were simple, but some of them had me jumping so that he could see my hands over the hood for spotting.
There is also one deceptively deep hole. It is quite the sickening feeling to open the door to the sound of sloshing, only to pull it closed quickly and drag water into the floorboard (‘18 4Runner). The winch was used to good effect, and we continued the trip. The interior, however, did develop its own special odor over the next few days.
We were both considering the things we would be telling our wives about what exactly happened. My brother’s was better than mine; he decided that, since his wife limited him to 33"s instead of 35"s, she was really the one to blame for getting mud and water in the interior. He had nothing for the dent in the rear quarter from the tree he hit.
We were both considering that as we rafted the Gauley under dam release. It didn’t help that our guide told us that no one had died since EARLY September.
It was the middle of September.
Okay, you’ve convinced me. I need to make a road trip down to West Virginia, behind the wheel of something four-wheel-drive and capable. A Jeep? A Land Cruiser? Throw some Facebook Marketplace links in the comments to enable my bad ideas.
Went playing at the local Subaru Overland event in my little fwd minivan.
They told me I’d never make the woods trail, I proved them wrong with ease the first time through.
After a day of rain and the AWD boys tearing up/getting stuck on the woods trail, we decided we needed to give it one last go before we left.
Ended up in a 1.5 hour adventure in trying to pull out a vehicle buried on it’s chassis......
Sometimes, it’s hard to know the limit of your vehicle’s capability until you pass it. Other times, you can look at a mud puddle that’s had ruts carved in by Jeep wheels and pretty definitively say “hmm yeah that might be a bit much.”
Taking a 4 seat RZR up into the mountains just outside Yellowstone with my wife and young kids. We drove on trails much too narrow and steep for any road vehicle to traverse safely, saw wildlife up close, abandoned mines/equipment, cabins no one had lived in for decades, and some of the most spectacular views I’ve ever witnessed in my life.
Months later, my kids still talk constantly about how awesome it was.
Off-roading gives you the opportunity to see sights you never could from the comfort and safety of tarmac. As 4x4s and side-by-sides go electric, those views will only get better — imagine, all the fun of trail driving without scaring away the wildlife.
In college some friends and I took a spring break camping trip to the Grand Canyon (which I learned it snows at the top in spring, oops). We wanted to do to that big glass walkout platform, but found that it was pretty expensive since I think it required both a ticket for the skywalk and some kind of other general pass to get there at the time. It was something like $75/person all in, which was a no go for a trip that otherwise only cost us broke college kids ~$350 a person in total. We only used physical maps for our road trips at the time, for both the experience and because this was 2010, so GPS was available but not near the quality at our then budget. We saw an “unpaved unknown road” through an Indian Reservation that went really close to the skywalk we thought we could take and sneak our way on.
The challenge of this all comes from the fact that we were in a Pontiac G5. The first part ~10 miles of that road were a pretty nice flat gravel, which was no issue for the G5. The next 5 miles were mostly dirt, but it was all cleared, mostly flat, and dry so the car was able to keep rolling. The next 3 miles are where things got real sketchy, as there were massive divots full of water, boulders in the pathway, and just overall the kind of road meant for a Wrangler (or maybe a horse). We went ‘full 20 year old’ thinking were smart enough to traverse this pathway in a sedan and dumb enough to forget were 15+ miles from civilization in the desert. Most of it was flat enough and we took turns spotting small hills to be sure the car always had somewhere we could turn around until we got to a big hill that split into a fork not on the map. Those previous 18 miles followed the map pretty well, but that fork were we had to draw the line because it went from a 20' wide path to two 10' wide paths, which meant the car would have had to try to cross those divots. To this day it’s still on our bucket list to go back to that road and traverse the whole thing in an appropriate transportation (assuming we didn’t break a reservation laws doing that, a res cop followed us halfway down the gravel road and eventually just turned around and we assume left us so he could laugh at us later).
We did learn that an offroader is really only necessary in specific situations and the crop up of CUVs appearing around 2010 was BS back then in regards to being “rugged”, so we all drove sedans for a lot longer than our peers.
Sure, you could buy a Wrangler Rubicon and handle yourself off-road. But do you really need that much capability for the trails you’ll be tackling? Consider the humble Pontiac, a sedan known not for its gravel prowess but for... something. Probably. In retrospect I’m genuinely unsure what the G5's value proposition was, other than being Not A Cobalt.
Going into the Highlands of Iceland in a rented Dacia Duster. Roads rattled the front license plate right off the car, forged rivers, felt like on another planet. Not the most technical but one of the most memorable of my off road experiences.
Nothing’s faster than a rented car, and nothing’s more capable than a rented off-roader. The trails don’t need to be complex when you aren’t paying to replace the tires — mash the throttle, and you’ll have your Colin McRae Experience in short order.
Also, the first line of this comment fits near-perfectly into the meter of Nobody Speak. Just wanted to point that out.
Let me tell you about a place called Wellsville Ohio.
Most of the land was bought up by a company about 5 years ago, so theres a lot of risk in going now, but some of it is still open to ride. But back in the heyday, boy oh boy. Bikes, Mud trucks, Jeeps, homebuilt creations, rock buggies, Sand rails with tractor tires, all running amok with zero authority to keep anyone in line. It was Like Forza Horizon, but everyone is drunk.
It was a completely lawless place, with miles and miles of trails with no specific direction, and absolutely no map or signs of any kind. There were rules to this place. You never go alone, you never go without someone who knows the trails, and you never, under any circumstance, leave your vehicle there by itself for any length of time. The sides of the trails were littered with burned out husks of stolen or abandoned vehicles, because when I say it was lawless, I mean it was LAWLESS. Police or Medical help were 30 minutes away at the very best, and if you got yourself hurt way out in the sticks, you were in very big trouble.
Helicopter Lifeflights were a weekly occurence in the summer, and no, im not exaggerating.
But if you were brave or stupid enough to go anyway, you were rewarded with some of the most insane trails you’ve ever seen. You could stick to the main roads and the play areas (kind of like hubs that lead to different trails) and have a blast off roading a bone stock SUV. Or, you could Take a brand new RZR off the showroom floor, hit the hard trails, and completely destroy your suspension, axles,and undercarriage in a matter of an afternoon. It was THAT rough.
We went every weekend, breaking vehicles and ourselves, until we all had kids and realized we needed to be more responsible.
But man oh man, do I miss the crazy memories of that place.
Sometimes, the hardest part of off-roading is finding land that will actually let you do it. Huge tracts like this aren’t easy to come by, and with the real estate market the way it is they likely won’t be getting more plentiful any time soon. If you’re reading this, and you’re a billionaire, please buy some land to set aside for ‘froading. We’ll eat you last.
Any time I can get out to the Rockies in Colorado.
Look, it’s hard to pick a single joke to make about the word “rock.” It’s been used and overused in popular music, so sometimes the only winning move is to make every move at once. Shotgun approach, throw references at the wall and see what sticks.
It was 20 some years ago. I was living in London. A buddy of mine asked if I wanted to go to the Birmingham Auto show. He daily drove a Lotus Elise. That alone made the round trip memorable.
The show itself was amazing. I got to see lots of great cars, many unavailable to us Yanks. I spent 45 minutes just gob smacked in the TVR booth.
Anyway, my buddy says, “We need stop by the Range Rover booth. My brother works for them. He supposed to be here this weekend.” OK, so we mosey over. Sure enough, Bro is there. We make introductions. Chit chat ensues. At some point, Bro asked me, “So, American? Have you ever driven a Range Rover?” No, can’t say as I have, bring a broke ass, newly married, 20 something living in one of the most expensive cities in the world. Bro shakes his head. “You guys. Follow me.” We go under the ropes, behind the booth, and out the back door. There a Range Rover taxies us a few minutes away to an off road test track. At this track, Ranger Rover dignitaries, which apparently we had just become, were offered rides/drives on all manners of terrain.
I was, and have mostly been, a sporty car guy all my life. I didn’t know much about off roading. How exciting could it be driving through mud puddles? Well let me tell you, this event changed that notion real quick. Going up 30-40 degree slopes, watching water roll over the hood of a vehicle that cost more my than rental flat, climbing over boulders, logs, and pretty much anything we damn well wanted to because this Ranger Rover is an unstoppable beast, was... incredible. It was the best possible foray into the world of off roading.
When someone offers you the VIP experience, you don’t say no. Our own Andy Kalmowitz got that same treatment from Jaguar Land Rover recently, and while he was roundly dunked upon for it in the office, I’d bet he doesn’t regret the time spent off-roading in luxury. Or cruising around in private jets.
When I was a kid, my dad bought an old ‘75 Jeep CJ5. It was beat up, but still solid and ran with no problems.
We took it out to a family friend’s property to go hog hunting. This was shortly after a rain, so everything was all wet and muddy. We came across one low point and needed to cross, which the Jeep handled just fine, except it got stuck on the other side. Thankfully, the worn but trustworthy winch was able to pull us out.
A little later, we came across what’s still to this day the largest hog I’ve ever seen. Seriously, this thing’s shoulders were at the hood of the Jeep. It was straight up like the hog monster from Princess Mononoke. A different family friend had a new .30-06 rifle he wanted to try. He hit the hog, and it didn’t even faze the thing.
When it was time to head back, we ended up taking a different route, basically circling around the property. We ended up coming across another low point full of water. Mark, the family friend, was positive the Jeep would make it, no problem. Dad wanted to turn back, but Mark was adamant it was fine. Well, we hit it a little faster, and this fucking Jeep FLOATED across the water. There were a few holes rusted through the floorboard, which had 12 year old me just a little worried. We made it though, although the mud on the other side was much deeper. My brother and I had to crawl along the side fenders to attach the winch, which definitely struggled this time. Years later and we still bring it up
Those old Jeeps had thin body panels, little safety equipment, and some fairly large tires — it makes sense, then, that it could float for a bit. I’m not sure I’d try to ford a river in one, but maybe with a couple oars you could make a decent crossing. I’ll leave that up to you to try.
When I was in high school, my family had a ‘67 FJ40. It had no modifications. One Sunday I went to a kegger with 8 other guys, all in the FJ40! This year had the side-by-side troop seats in the back and we had the keg in between the seats. Note that none of the back seat passengers had seat belts, nor did the guy in the middle in the front seat.
After the keg was emptied, we put it in the back of the very warm FJ40 and went back to partying.
When we got back to the Land Cruiser, we found that the remains of the keg had sprayed around the interior, making a gagging smell.
With windows down, I decided to screw around in a dry creek bed, sliding around and driving too fast. I went around a bend and found that I had to hit either a tree or a large boulder. I chose the boulder. The car went up on two wheels and I fought to keep it under control while trying not to climb the creek bed or tip over. We stopped, caught our breath, took inventory of each other (a few cuts and bruises) and then drove about 15mph the rest of the way home.
Monday morning I made excuses for why I needed to drive the FJ40 to school. Instead I went to an alignment shop. I didn’t tell the guy why I was in, so he came back to me after 1/2 hour asking, “What do you want me to do? There’s nothing wrong!”
I also took a hose and sprayed out the interior. Mom & Dad had no idea what that car went through.
Old FJs are, by all means known to god or man, unkillable. if rust can be kept away, no other weapon can so much as wound the FJ — it’s a sort of kryptonite situation. That alignment, maintained through the duration of some James Bond shit, is standard operating procedure.
Any number of times when my friend’s 1987 Toyota Tercel 4wd wagon went places no wagon had any business going.
If I had to pick one, there was one time bombing around in a field at night where we hit a large obstacle. It was dark & the field was overgrown, we thought it was a hill or rock or something. It stopped the car dead in it’s tracks, and it took a lot of pushing/rocking to get the thing off of the obstacle.
After sorting ourselves and getting back to pavement, we heard a loud scraping noise and saw a trail of sparks behind us.
Fearing the worst, we hopped out to investigate and found a piece of farm equipment wrapped around the rear axle.
The bump we hit and ultimately drove over was a large tow-behind landscape rake. And we were dragging a piece of it with us.
The only thing that could stop that Tercel was rust, sadly. But to this day every time I see one it reminds me of how enormously capable those things were/are.
If there’s one thing the Tercel is known for, it’s Breaking Bad nearly killing its occupants through ill-advised automotive shenanigans. Tearing through fields under cover of darkness is a prime Tercel activity, doubly so when things go wrong.
It’s a tie between the only 2 times I’ve really done any actual off roading, with the first one being with a college mate taking my Dakota (which didn’t have working 4WD) over some terrain to get to a spot for a bit of a party out in the woods with the rest of our group, and the second when I did some very light, but actual off-roading with a couple of people on the outskirts of the town we went to college at.
With the Dakota, it was the last time I ever did anything with them that wasn’t just going some places to shop or stuff before we graduated.... Granted, it’s not like we went miles and miles to this spot: It was probably 30 yards at best. But boy did that Dakota do some moves getting to and from the spot lmao
The light off-roading was with a heavily done up JK, a not-as-done-up-but-still-modified XJ, a lightly done-up TJ, and a stock JK. I was only riding shotgun in the stock JK, but it was still quite something.
If you’re trying to hide your college parties from prying eyes, you may want to go more than thirty yards off of the road. But, if your Dakota is already slipping by there, maybe just relax and bust out the keg — you’re not doing anything else, are you?
In college, my roommate and I would always try to find shortcuts on the way from our hometown in northern New Mexico to our school in the southern part of the state. We noticed a forest service road we could get to from the backroad we usually took, that went over a mountain, but would save about 20 miles off the route.
The road wasn’t that bad, but it was raining. And we were in a ‘94 coupe. We actually made it just about to the top of the mountain, but nearly got stuck in muddy sections several times. After doing a complete 180 and barely sliding out of a mud pit, we decided to not press our luck anymore and just drive back down.
Nearly got stuck several more times, but made it through by just gunning it and letting the car slide and bounce off the embankment on either side to get back to pavement.
We never tried that route again.
Technically this may not be an off-road adventure, but it’s far from anywhere a coupe should be. I’ll allow it. As for losing all car control on a wet hill, you can always borrow a technique from across the pond: The gutter run. If your wheels are locked in a trench, you can never spin out.
A few years ago my family and I took a trip to the Keweenaw Peninsula, on Lake Superior. US Highway 40, which also runs all the way down to Key West, ends near Copper Harbor at its most northern point.
But after the pavement, the gravel keeps going. And then it runs into an entirely unmaintained trail.
So we just keep exploring, to see how far we could go. We crawled and bounced our way until we hit water.
My wife spent most of the time knitting. I suggested to her that holding on might be more comfortable, but she replied, ‘this is the only thing keeping me sane.’
It is a cherished memory of exploring with my family.
Much like the RZR entry before, exploration is such a core part of what makes off-roading fun. Even if you’re on a planned trail, it can be something you’ve never experienced before — and the thrill of discovery comes all the same. Next time, try and ford the water, and see where you end up. Maybe Ontario.
I’m not an off-road guy. I’ve never really craved jeeps. But some twenty years ago a bunch of friends and I travelled out to Colorado to go Jeeping. We rented a CJ and took it off road. For some reason the driving duties mostly fell on me. We took that car over boulder strewn, barely-roads, through riverbeads, up and down embankments and insane inclines, stuff that would quickly destroy and strand a normal car. After all that, although I still don’t have any real desire to own a Jeep, I have inmense respect for what those vehicles can do.
After owning a Wrangler in my teens, I’ve never really been struck with the desire to buy another. But the respect, the admiration of just what that vehicle can do when you push it, never truly goes away.
When I worked out in the desert near Arizona, I used to van pool. The I-10 is 2 lanes in either direction, with no alternate routes, so if there’s a crash, you’re pretty much boned. That is, we WOULD have been stuck for several hours, but the other riders and I unanimously decided to take the trails until we could pass the site of the crash. Sliding around a Ford Transit in the sand is surprisingly fun.
When even Ford’s press photos show a Transit headed off road, you have the complete right to try it out for yourself. I’d recommend an all-wheel drive model, not just for traction, but for the ability to rip van slides in the dirt.
Bumping around the backroads and trails in the canyons of Utah valley with my new college roommates in a 1970's Land Cruiser FJ40 one of them owned. They called it The Goat. It wasn’t like they were the gnarliest of trails, but it was my first time doing any off-roading of any sort and the remembrance of the vehicle and the life long friends I made that year have stuck with me.
When a quirked up Toyota with a little bit of off-road prowess busts it down 4x4 style, is it goated with the sauce? Sources say yes.
We went offroad in a Suzuki Samurai during a visit to Aruba. We were stuffing that little monster into places a Wrangler wouldn’t get through due to width. Ever since that day I have had the utmost love and respect for the Samurai/Jimny platform.
If the Suzuki Samurai was offered in the U.S., there would be no reason to buy any other vehicle. That’s why we don’t get it here, it’s nothing to do with crash tests or chicken taxes. It would simply destroy the U.S. car market, by making every other vehicle obsolete.
Recently on a work trip to Las Vegas I rented a Willy’s Wrangler through Turo. 30 minutes outside of Vegas there’s a whole bunch of amazing off roading. Spent 11 hours in the desert exploring, all for a little over $120 with insurance included. Highly recommended.
I’m not sure what Turo’s rules on off-roading are, but any renter offering a Jeep must know what they’re getting themselves into. The descendants of Willys-Overland can only visit roads for so long — like dolphins, they must eventually come up for air.